Long life or a life well lived: what about the glass of wine?
My mother died young, of an autoimmune disease. She died at the age I am now. That weighs on me, and it has shaped how I read everything in this series.
She used to say it was better to look good than to feel good. When she did feel good, she lived as if it were her last day. I was upset with her. I wanted her to live longer.
I have asked myself for years who was right. Is a longer life worth giving up what we enjoy? Or is the point a life well lived?
Take one common pleasure, alcohol. The studies do not agree, so here are both sides.
For decades, studies found that light drinkers lived longer than people who never drank. The Harvard study behind the five habits counted light to moderate drinking among them. Its limit was up to about one drink a day for women and two for men.
A 2023 review looked again. It combined 107 studies covering 4.8 million people and 425,564 deaths. Light drinkers had a 15% lower risk of death than non-drinkers in the raw numbers.
But in 86 of the 107 studies, the non-drinking group included former drinkers. Some had quit because they were sick, which makes non-drinkers look less healthy. After correcting for this, the difference was small and not significant.
The same review found higher risk starting at about 25 grams a day for women, roughly two drinks. For men it started at about 45 grams, roughly three. Critics reply that the review used only part of the research. They add that studies that only watch people cannot show cause.
Alcohol and health: four sources, one disputed question
| Source | Year | What it said |
|---|---|---|
| Harvard five-habit study | 2018 | Counted light to moderate drinking as one low-risk habit |
| Review of 107 studies | 2023 | No significant protection after correcting for former drinkers in the comparison group |
| National Academies report | 2024 | Moderate drinking linked to a lower risk of death than not drinking, and to a higher risk of breast cancer |
| US Surgeon General's advisory | 2025 | Alcohol is the third leading preventable cause of cancer in the US, with about 100,000 cases and 20,000 deaths a year |
One drink is about 14 grams of alcohol in the United States. Sizes vary elsewhere.
The advisory adds that about 17% of those cancer deaths occur at levels within current guidelines. So the cost does not start only at heavy drinking.
My reading is this. Nobody can say a daily glass adds years. Nobody can say an occasional glass costs many. The risk rises with the amount. For some people a little is hard to keep little, and a doctor or counselor can help.
I have also read that stress in the mind can show up in the body. A Swedish study followed 106,464 people with stress-related disorders and 1,064,640 people without them.
Autoimmune disease was about 36% more likely among those with the disorders. It appeared in 9.1 of every 1,000 people each year, against 6.0 for the others. Most people in the study did not develop one.
This shows a link. It does not show that a mind caused any one person's illness. I do not claim that about my mother, and the study does not either.
What I keep from her is what she said about sacrifice. A long life can ask for some. That is not the point. The point is a life well lived.
I still wish she had more years. I also see what she meant.
The studies measure years. None of them measure joy. If a pleasure carries some risk, moderation may be a reasonable second choice. For some people, a life well lived may be worth more than extra years.
What would you not give up, and why? Tell us in the comments. Someone may need your answer.
Sources we read
Li and others, Impact of healthy lifestyle factors on life expectancies in the US population, Circulation, 2018 (definition of moderate drinking). https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6207481/
Zhao and others, Association between daily alcohol intake and risk of all-cause mortality: a systematic review and meta-analyses, JAMA Network Open, 2023. https://www.drugsandalcohol.ie/38515/
Zhao and others, 2023, abstract and results (107 studies, 425,564 deaths, former-drinker bias in 86 studies). https://www.news-medical.net/news/20230404/What-is-the-association-between-mean-daily-alcohol-intake-and-all-cause-mortality.aspx
Alcohol Research Forum, critique of the 2023 review. https://alcoholresearchforum.org/critique-281/
NBC News, report on the Surgeon General's advisory and the National Academies report. https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/alcohol-cancer-risk-warning-surgeon-general-report-rcna186095
US Department of Health and Human Services, Surgeon General's Advisory on Alcohol and Cancer Risk, 2025. https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/oash-alcohol-cancer-risk.pdf
Ohio State University summary of the advisory (levels within guidelines; added cancer risk at two drinks a day). https://health.osu.edu/health/cancer/surgeon-general-alcohol-cancer-risk
Song and others, Association of stress-related disorders with subsequent autoimmune disease, JAMA, 2018. https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/fullarticle/2685155
Tell us in the comments