What Our Children Want From the House (Ask Them)
Priya would take the good china, and Sam would take Howard's desk.
Picture a couple named Howard and Peggy, both 70, who are about to spend most of each year abroad. Their two grown children, Sam and Priya, live in other cities in small apartments. Howard and Peggy had already decided what each child would get. Priya would take the good china, and Sam would take Howard's desk.
Peggy had a hunch they might be wrong, and she said so. Howard did not like guessing at what his children wanted. “Then let's ask them,” he said.
They sent the same message to both children. Pick three things from the house, tell us why, and we will tell you why we love them too.
Howard and Peggy waited by the phone for two days. Sam called first. Peggy put him on speaker.
“I don't want the desk,” Sam said. “I have nowhere to put it.”
Nobody spoke. Peggy felt her face go warm. Howard looked at the desk, which he had built a drawer for, and swallowed.
Then Sam went on. “But I want the porch swing. And Dad's coffee can of bolts. And the recipe box.”
Howard laughed out loud. The coffee can had sat on a shelf for twenty years and he had never thought of it as anything. Sam remembered sorting bolts in it on Saturdays while Howard fixed things.
Priya's answers came by message that night.
| What they guessed | What the children picked |
|---|---|
| Priya: the good china | The recipe box, the blue mixing bowl, the hallway mirror |
| Sam: Howard's desk | The porch swing, the can of bolts, the recipe box |
Both children had picked the recipe box. Peggy copied her mother's cards by hand into a second box so each of them could have one. She wrote Priya's name on the lid of one and Sam's on the other.
When Sam carried the swing to his car, Howard walked beside him with the can. He had not planned to feel so glad. A thing he had used for years was going to someone who had asked for it by name.
You could…
- Send each child the same short message, asking for three things and a reason.
- Offer to tell the story behind anything they choose.
- Offer what no child picks to other people who may be looking for it.
What would your children name first, and would it surprise you? Share it in the comments. A reader with a message to send to their children this week could feel readier after reading your answer.
Tell us in the comments