A Short Look That Turns Into Seven Years

A good trial, I think, is built to be able to say no.

By Neil Solomon · 2 min read

Picture a couple named Iris and Tom. They are curious about an island they have read about but never seen. They do not want to buy anything or sign anything. They want to go for a few weeks and see how it feels.

Two stories speak to that plan, and they sit at opposite ends.

Cabo Verde. Someone describes planning a vacation to explore retirement potential. They are looking at three places on different islands, and they want to know which one, if any, suits them. I like how modest this is. The trip is a question, not a commitment. A good trial, I think, is built to be able to say no.

Morocco. The other story is a three-month sabbatical that became seven years. I read longing in it, in the kindest sense. The writer meant to take a short break, and the place took hold. I do not know the details, but the shape is clear: a trial can work too well. It can turn into a life before the person has made a decision.

Here is how I would set the two together.

Both outcomes are fine. The useful thing is to know ahead of time which kind of trial you are running. A scouting trip needs a list of things to test. A sabbatical needs an honest talk about what you will do if you do not want to leave.

Iris and Tom discuss it over dinner.

"What if we hate it?" Tom asks.

"Then we have a nice holiday," Iris says.

"And what if we love it?"

She thinks. "Then we should have a plan for that too."

I would like to agree with her, gently. We prepare for the bad outcome and forget the good one. Loving a place has consequences: papers, a home, family far away, a different winter. If you only plan for the no, the yes can catch you.

A trial also tells you more when it is a little ordinary. Visit a grocery store. Ride the local bus. Sit in a waiting room, if you can. See what a rainy day looks like. The postcard days tell you little.