A Few Days With Family, Then Ready to Go Home
By the fourth day, they found themselves looking at the calendar and thinking about their own front door far away.
Picture a couple named Edith and Robert. They had lived in Morocco for a while, and they flew back to see their family. The first day was full of hugs. The second was full of stories. By the fourth day, they found themselves looking at the calendar and thinking about their own front door far away.
This is based on an account I read of a retiree who spent a few days with family back home and then felt ready to go home. Home, in that sentence, meant Morocco. I find that sentence interesting. It tells me where the person's heart had settled.
Two kinds of home
Leaving family behind is one of the hardest parts of a move. Many people worry about it before they go. They imagine guilt, longing and distance.
The story I read tells another side. A visit can be warm and also short. The love is there, and so is a quiet wish for one's own bed, one's own routine, one's own street. That does not mean the family matters less. It means the person has made a life, and the life is somewhere else now.
What stands out to me is the lack of drama. The person did not say they were torn. They said they were content, and then ready.
After the farewell
"Was it too short?" asked Robert, at the airport gate.
"It was exactly right," said Edith. "I love them. And I am glad to be going back."
"Are you allowed to say both?"
"I think I have to."
I like that exchange because it lets two feelings sit side by side.
How I read it
If you worry about being far from family, it may help to picture the visits. How long do you like to stay? How often would you like to come? Some people find that shorter, warmer visits suit everyone better than living in the same town. Others find that being away stirs a longing that grows with time. Both are true for different people.
It also helps to ask the family. They may feel differently from what you expect.
You could…
- Talk with your family about how often you would visit each other.
- Picture a typical visit and notice how you feel on the fourth day.
- Ask someone who has moved how the first trip home felt.
- Write down what you would want to share with family before you leave.
When you last visited family, on which day did you feel ready to go home?
Tell us in the comments